Decisions

If you read my teammates blogs, which I hope you do. We have some decisions to make.  Now if you know me very well, which you might not. I am a person who stresses easily. I get freaked out by decisions that I have to make and seriously can make myself sick (literally sick) worrying about it. 

I realized that I was wasn’t freaking out on the way home from youth group tonight. I was driving my car and Becca and Ashley were talking about how God hasn’t spoken to them on the time frame we were given to make our decisions.  I had stopped listening for a second and thought how I wasn’t freaking out, I wasn’t even stressed about it, or worried in the least bit about making these decisions. I know I care them, I haven’t become insensitive to there importance but I think I am (finally) seeing God’s work in my life. It is hard to see the changes that you have made. Last year I was voted most changed and that really surprised me because I didn’t see a difference in my own life. Probably, because we have changed so subtly in our minds, well that and it might have to do with the fact that my memory lasts about 2 seconds.

So, the decisions we have to make are:
1. We have been given the option to help lead the high school trips that are going out in June, I would have to raise more money and miss the last weeks we have left as a team.

2. The Youth Group we are involved in is having something similar to a retreat weekend and the Youth Pastor wants to know if we would like to lead the small groups. 

Neither of these are group decisions, some can chose to and some cannot.  I already have a good idea of what I want to do. When people were explaining our options I just knew what I was supposed to do. I hope that this is not just me thinking that but God telling me what to do, and truthfully I believe it is. 

This year I wrote some bible studies on Listening Prayer (praying to god for advice then just waiting for him to answer.) I think this has really helped me to get a better handle on this technique, not to say that I’m an expert or even good but I think that might be what helped me know what I should do. Plus, someone once told me that serving God (especially in missions) is not going against his will because that is what he called us all to. I also learned through my studying that sometimes we over analyze what is God and what isn’t. So I have decided to go with my gut, and I am very peaceful about it.  I do want confirmation but I think I’ll be okay if I don’t get that, plus I know that the devil is going to try and convince me I made the wrong decision. I will tell you of my plans when I have a better idea.

Sorry it’s so long.